Pakistani Wedding Events in Order: Dholki to Walima

A Pakistani shaadi is not one day. It is a season of events, and each one has its own guests, its own colours and its own card. Here is the usual order, what happens at each event, and who is normally invited.

Updated 14 October 2026

1. Baat Pakki (rishta pakka)

When both families agree to the rishta, they share mithai and duas at a small gathering. It is usually only close family, so the invitation is often just a phone call or a simple message.

Tip: a small, soft card (rose gold or pink) is enough. Keep the guest list short.

2. Mangni (engagement)

At the Mangni the families exchange rings and gifts. Some families hold it months before the wedding, others a few days before. It can be a dinner at home or a small event at a hall.

3. Dholki

Dholki nights start one or two weeks before the shaadi. Friends and cousins sing tappay and boliyan with the dholak, and there is chai and food. Some families hold one dholki, others hold one every night.

Tip: if you have many dholki nights, add each night as a separate event so guests can reply for each one.

4. Mayun (mayon or ubtan)

The bride (and sometimes the groom) wears yellow, and close women of the family put ubtan and haldi on her. It is often a ladies event at home, a few days before the Mehndi.

5. Mehndi (Rasm-e-Hina)

The most colourful night: green and yellow clothes, marigold flowers, songs, dances and mehndi on the bride's hands. Many families hold a joint Mehndi for both sides, others hold separate ones.

Tip: add a dress code on the card, like "Green and yellow", so guests come ready.

6. Qawwali Night (optional)

Many families now add a Qawwali Night or Mehfil-e-Sama during the wedding week, with a qawwal party, chai and dinner.

7. Nikah

The Nikah is the religious marriage contract, with the ijab-o-qabool, witnesses and a dua. It can be in a masjid, at home or at the hall, often on the same day as the Barat or Rukhsati.

8. Barat and Rukhsati

On the Barat day, the groom's family arrives at the bride's venue with the groom. After dinner comes the Rukhsati, the emotional moment when the bride leaves her parents' home with duas. The bride's family usually hosts this day.

Tip: write the Barat arrival time and the dinner time separately, and add a Google Maps link to the venue.

9. Walima (Valima)

The Walima is the reception hosted by the groom's family after the Nikah and Rukhsati. It is a sunnah and is usually the more formal dinner, often with a calm ivory and gold card.

Who sends which card?

  • Bride's family: Mayun, Mehndi (their side), Barat and Rukhsati.
  • Groom's family: Mehndi (their side) and Walima.
  • Both families: Baat Pakki, Mangni, Nikah and a joint Mehndi or Qawwali Night.

This is the common pattern, but every family is different. With ApniDawat you can put all your events on one card and choose which guests see which events.

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Questions

How many days before the wedding should we send cards?

For the main events (Barat, Walima), 3 to 4 weeks before is common. For Dholki nights, one to two weeks is usually enough. Ask guests to reply about one week before each event.

Can we invite some people only to the Walima?

Yes. Many families invite a smaller group to the Mehndi and Nikah and a bigger group to the Barat or Walima. On ApniDawat you tick the events for each guest.

See also